One of the mods here speaking (and really the only one left) wingeddildos/onionbeckett (who is now on a new blog) has left this blog in my care now. So I’ll be taking over this verse.
I do plan to do something with it, once I have some space as I have many other projects in the works. This verse will get a complete fic of it’s own at some point. I may even attempt to do it for the next DCBB.
Cas is standing in front of the bleachers, arms wrapped around him as he tries to keep his body heat in during this oddly cold game, while he waits on the sidelines for Coach Shurley to put him in. He’s rubbing his arms down and about to go find the coach and ask if he can get his jacket out of the car, when something warm and heavy drops down on his shoulders, making him turn and look up into Dean’s smiling face.
“You know, for a star soccer player and being an ace at academic shit, you can be really dumb when it comes to crap like this.” Cas sticks his tongue out at his boyfriend, but doesn’t hesitate to shove his arms through the sleeves of the coat the Dean brought him, before reaching up and pulling the younger boy further over the railing of the bleachers so that he can give him a kiss in thanks.
They get lost in the lazy trading of mouths and tongues, especially since none of Castiel’s teammates are on the sidelines to tease them, before they hear a whistle and Castiel’s coach yelling at him that he’s in. He slips the coat off and hands it back to Dean, stealing another kiss while he does.
“Root for me?” Dean smiles and nods.
“Always.”
warnings: bullying, physical abuse/violence, homophobia, passing thought/mention of suicide
You’re eleven years old and your whole world has just gone to hell.
You’ve done nothing wrong. You were just watching TV and you wandered into the channels that you weren’t supposed to. But instead of a girl and a guy on the screen, it’s two guys. And there’s a big part of you that likes it.
But then you hear the garage door opening, so you scramble for the remote you dropped and flip the channel back to 7 before turning the TV off and going out to meet your parents and help them carry in groceries.
You’re eleven years old and nothing will ever be the same again.
-
You’re fifteen years old and you think hell would be preferable to this.
You’ve done nothing wrong. But these boys from the sophomore soccer team caught you making out with a boy from the school across town. Victor helps you fight them off, but you both know he can’t always be there. So on Monday, you go to school and you get jumped.
You get sent home that day and you get a few days out of school. Your dad blows up at you, because you aren’t the type that gets into fights. But that evening he and your mom find out that you like guys over girls. You expect to be called every horrible name in the book. They hug you instead and tell you that they’ll always love you no matter what.
You go back to school on Friday and get jumped again. And you continue to get jumped for the rest of the year.
You’re fifteen years old and you want to die.
-
You’re eighteen years old and your heart is racing.
You’ve done nothing wrong. But Sam just came stumbling out of the boys locker room with the beginnings of a black eye. All it takes is one look at your baby brother and you’re shoving him into Gabe’s arms and charging into the locker room to find the son of a bitch that did it.
Only Cas finds them first. Your boyfriend looks like a madman as he throws Gordon Walker into the locker opposite of them. A few of the other members of the soccer team are holding back his step-brother as Cas goes to town on the older of the two. But you get between them. Cas already has one charge against him for an incident last year, the last thing he needs is another one. But Gordon doesn’t get off easily and you have to admit that the cast is a lovely addition to his person. Not to mention that it ruins the rest of his soccer season, so yeah, you’re feeling pretty damn pleased with yourself.
You’re eighteen years old and you are done being afraid.
-
But it all starts with you being eleven years old and your world going to hell.
[AU since we know how they meet in canon]
It was a usual day. Trying to dodge the foot ball team and over all survive high school. They dressed him up in the cheerleading teams uniform, for kicks and had chased him across the field. Likely they wanted to get pictures but he was not going to let them if he had his way.
warning: physical violence and implied homophobia and self-harm
You wanna fight back
You’re out in the open
You’re under attack
But your spirits not broken
You know it’s worth fighting for!
The blow came out of nowhere, cracking him across his face until his head whipped back from it. There was blood in his mouth, he could taste it. But all it did was make him furious. So what if he had been caught making out with Victor Henriksen from that fancy private school across town? It wasn’t like it was a crime to kiss another boy. It was the 21st century for fuck’s sake.
So Dean swung back, just like his father had taught him when he was younger, and he grinned like a madman when he heard that satisfying crunch of bone under his fist. Unfortunately, he didn’t get a chance to pull back for a second hit, as heard the shout of a teacher echo across the lot, forcing the other kids that had been gathered around him to scatter, making him take the heat for it all.
And take the heat he did.
He got three days out of school and his dad had to come and get him. He was sitting on the steps, fiddling with his MP3 player when the Impala rumbled to a stop in front of him. He got in, not saying a word cause he could feel the anger coming off his usually calm father. He was just glad that his dad waited until they were at home before ripping into him.
“And what the hell was up with today’s little stunt?! A FIGHT?! A DAMN FIGHT?!! IN THE FOURTEEN YEARS YOU’VE BEEN ALIVE, YOU HAVE NEVER DONE SOMETHING LIKE THAT! SO WHY NOW?!” Dean swallowed heavily, fighting back the tears that were threatening, because he hated being yelled at. It made him feel like he was the dirt beneath everyone’s feet. He opened his mouth to answer but his dad stopped him with a sharp look and a hand under his chin, lifting his face up to get a better look at the cheek that the bullies had hit. His dad’s face started falling as he began to piece together what had happened. “You didn’t start the fight, did you?” Dean swallowed again and shook his head. John sighed and took his hand from under his son’s chin, only to pull the boy into a hug, that Dean returned by clinging to him. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to yell at you.”
“I know.” It was muffled, because Dean refused to pull away from the hug, but John heard him anyways and hugged him tighter, before pulling back at bit so that he could look at his son’s face.
“Come on, let’s go find something for your face. It’s going to swell if we don’t.” Dean nodded and followed his dad into the kitchen.
But that night when Mary and Sam got home, John had to tell her about the fight and because Dean can’t lie to his mom to save his life, he ended up telling her about Victor and the whole damn mess that it’s created for him at school.
And years later, when his wrists are nothing but a mess of scars from the razor and he’s not entirely sure that he’s got any pride left for him to stand on, he’ll be thankful for that his parents are some of the few people that never hated him for what he is.
lyrics at the beginning are from Unbreakable Heart by Three Days Grace
Cas is in no way surprised when he pulls back into the school parking lot after his week long suspension and finds Anna and Gabe on Gabe’s car in their usual spot, waiting for him as they have every morning since they all started driving to school. What does surprise him though is to find Dean standing there with them, taking a licorice rope from Gabe when he smacks him across the face with it.
“AND THE PRODIGAL SON RETURNS!” Cas rolls his eyes at Gabe’s melodramatics and flips him off, getting a laugh out of Anna and Dean, before diving back into his car to turn it off and to grab his bag. “No, but seriously bro, welcome back. Now take your boyfriend off our hands before I decide to take him as my own. He’s been acting like a lost puppy all week.” Cas slams the door of his car shut and comes around it in time to see Dean punch Gabe in the arm hard enough to make the other boy rub at it and to make Anna snort, cause Gabe was so asking for it.
“Gabe, I think you got Dean confused with Sam, which means you should probably lay off the sugar. It’s messing with your brain.” Gabe flips him off, but he doesn’t care, cause at that moment, he ends up with an armful of Dean, who’s giving him the tightest hug he’s ever been given in recent memory.
“I missed you.” The words are barely loud enough for Cas to hear, but they make his heart swell, because this boy right here was worth it. Worth the suspension and the police record and his parents’ totally disappointed looks. And Cas will spend the rest of his life proving that to Dean if he has to.
Warnings: Depressive/suicidal thoughts, mentions of cutting, homophobia, bullying, physical abuse
I sometimes wish I had a reason to feel the way that I do.
I’m 17 years old and I want to die.
No one should want to die at 17.
Takes place in between this and this. Warning for violence, and bullying.
“Was it worth it…?” Anna asks, listening to Cas’ parents talking in the kitchen. She had come over as soon as she got the news. The police were gone finally leaving the teenager beaten and bruised in the living room.
As soon as she had laid eyes on him she moved to get the first aid kit. It did not take much to tell her what happened and why.
Jimmy was out in the hall talking with Gabe on his cell, explaining about Cas getting suspended. He would not fall back but this would tarnish his record. That was why she had to know, why they all had to know it was worth it.
It looks like he did not hear her, or was not paying attention but when she moves to ask again he finally says, “yes.”
It startles her and Jimmy both just staring at him like he had grown another head. The A+ student who worked hard for his grades. Star of the soccer team. Who now had a suspension, and a record with the police. She wants to ask why, they both do, but he raises his hand looking to her then his twin.
“Tell me…would you sit back and just watch knowing someone who you cared about was being hurt? Hell even if it wasn’t someone you liked, a friend, family, whatever…I couldn’t…can’t stand what they were doing. We both know what it was doing to him. What it still does to him. He can barely move through the halls with out flinching if someone gets to close or speaks to him. I got tired of seeing no one do a thing about it. Yeah violence isn’t the answer but I’m not going to be a pacifist about it anymore. It’s time someone took a stand and said no more, and even if they didn’t get suspended they won’t be getting out of the hospital for a while and that’s what’s important.”
He turns away from them both, staring out the window. “I’d happily bleed for Dean any day just to make sure he doesn’t have another one where he’s hiding in the bathroom crying…so yeah it’s definitely worth it.”
Reaching up the brushes the beginning of a tear from his eye smiling a little, “that’s all I needed to know.”
So, before we get started, this is just a warning that the following content of this ficlet actually happened to me.
There’s a sickening crunch sound as Dean jolts awake, his mind leaping into overdrive as he looks around to see where they are and to see what has happened. Cas is next to him, looking just as shocked as he pulls his car to a halt on the side of the road.
“Cas, Cas, what happened? Are you ok?” The older boy nods, but that’s it, he’s too out of it to do more. Dean fights to get his seat belt off and fights even harder to get his door open, cursing at it until it budges, giving him just enough space to squeeze out.
He does a walk around of Castiel’s car, taking in a mental note of all the damage that’s been done to it, before he attempts to pull the driver side door open. He gives up after a minute or two, when it’s clear that it’s not going to move. He goes back to the passenger side, clearly ignoring the giant scratch marks that run along it, indicating that for all intents and purposes, he should be a dead man, because that airbag should’ve popped and crushed his face.
“Cas, come on, your side is stuck, you need to come out over here.” Cas nods and lets go of the wheel, his movements stiff, like he’s still in shock. And after seeing the damage done on the other side, Dean knows that he very well could be.
Once he’s got Cas out of the car and has checked him over for major injuries, ignoring the fact that his own heart is racing and that he’s going to snap at any second, he pulls Cas into his arms and takes a deep whiff of his familiar scent, silently rejoicing in the fact that they’re both alive. Sure, they’re scared shitless and he’s sure that Cas is going to get his ass kicked by his dad for wrecking the car, just like he’s sure that he’s never going to be able to sleep in a moving vehicle ever again, but they’re alive and that’s all that matters.
And when the cops finally come, called by a concerned citizen that had driven by, Cas keeps one hand on Dean the whole time, like he knows how close he came to really losing him.
The backstory for this is that on Father’s Day 2009, I was involved in a minor car accident right outside of my hometown of Bourbonnais. At the time of the accident, I was sleeping in the front side passenger seat after an emotionally draining day of being out at my father’s grave. Both the cop and the mechanic that fixed the car confirmed that the only reason I survived the accident was because the airbag didn’t deploy, even though the car on my side had been hit in the right place for it to go off.
TW for homophobia, and bullying. Follows this.
There is one thing Dean Winchester has learned in his time at this school and that is that Castiel Novak never misses a day of school unless important. He gets even more worried when he hears whispers in the halls about the other teen being suspended, how Alastair and Gordon Walker were in the hospital and it was likely connected to Cas’ disappearance.
It takes everything in him to not just break out into a run and leave for the Novak’s home when he realizes something is wrong. The stares he gets in the hall do not help one bit, he can feel their eyes on his back…boring holes into his skin like they expect him to know. To add some fuel to the fire, fan the gossip.
His very existence did enough of that being a regular topic of it.
Shuddering as he remembered the one time he came to school to find the nasty words written on his locker he had to keep himself from hurling into the nearest garbage can. His interest in girls did not matter, just having the slightest fondness for other boys was enough for them. He only clung onto being in this school for Sam. Everything was for Sam. So his Mom would not need to worry about driving Sam to school as Dean went to another.
As soon as the bell rings he runs for the Impala, ignoring any questioning calls from people in the halls. He could text Jo later, right now Castiel is the only person on his mind. He has to know…needs to know what happened.
Sam does not question him when he tears out of the school parking lot. He had been already waiting and it only takes the words ‘Cas wasn’t in class’ for it to click in.
If he had not been driving he would have climbed right out of the car before it is stopped in the Novak’s driveway. Sam is the one to try and calm him down but when he gets outside Anna is already there calling him in. Dean’s entire body is shaking, he can barely breathe, he feels like he’s on auto pilot when he climbs from the car and heads for the door meeting the other right there.
“You - I…you weren’t at school, they said you were suspended. The Walker’s are in the hospital, I -” he’s rambling and he knows it and he does not even stop as Cas starts laughing. It takes bloodied lips crashing down against his own to silence him, his hands flailing before he closes his eyes, leaning into the others touch.
“I won’t let them hurt you…any one hurt you. Ever again…” Cas’ words are breathed against his lips and it feels like his heart skipped a beat.
“Come on you love birds, I have homework to do. If we’re going to be sticking around here can you at least move out of the doorway?” Sam whines from behind them and it feels like the tension has been lifted.
